The average unmarried female
Due to some long frustration
With psychosomatic symptoms
Affecting the upper respiratory tract
For that plain little band of gold
A person can develop a cold
Wherever you figure the strept-o-cocci lurk
You can give her a shot for whatever shes got
If shes tired of getting the fish-eye
A person can develop a cold
The female remaining single
Shows a nuerotic tendency
Involving the eye, the ear, and the nose, and throat.
Just from wondering whether the wedding is on or off
A person can develop a cough
You can feed her all day with the Vitamin A
But the medicine never gets anywhere
Near where the trouble is
If shes getting a kind of a name for herself
A person can develop a cough
Just from stalling and stalling
And stalling the wedding trip
A person can develop La Grippe
When they get on the train for Niagra
And she can hear church bells chime
The compartment is air conditioned
Then they get off at Saratoga
A person can develop La Grippe
La Grippe, La post nasil drip
With the wheezes and the sneezes
And a sinus that's really a pip
From the lack of community property
And a feeling shes getting too old
A person can develop a big, bad, cold!
