The Secret Admirer

She's got a sweet little asset
That can take her places
Where they don't recall names
But they remember faces
She knows how to use those feminine graces

She spends a lot of time
By the swimming pool
And if dancing was a brain disease
She'd be a dancing fool
And though she don't go to bed
On the first date as a rule...

She goes downtown
It's all marble and mirror
She casts sideways glances
She's got a secret admirer
She's the All-American
Made in America object of desire

She drives a sporty little foreign job
everywhere, She has a
lifetime subscription to
Vanity Fair
Her favorite charity
Is the man who does her hair

The advertising boys buy it
And sell it as Beauty
You run out to buy a copy
Like an unquestioned duty
It's no secret that the boys
At the disco call her 'Tooty'
(Tutti-Fruitti Go Rudy)

She goes to the disco
It's all chrome and mirror
She casts sideways glances
She's got a secret admirer
She's the All-American
Made in America object of desir