My Dad Is Rich

Alright, you can try to fuck with me
But before you do, there's something you should probably know

I keep that motherfuckin' thing on me and by thing I mean dad
Trust, you don't wanna make me mad 'cause I got him on speed dial
And he's rich as all heck
And he's strong, he'll be comin' for your neck
Yeah, my dad is straight evil, he's a mafia boss
And he's cutting me checks, now I'm lost in the sauce
Give me an arbitrary job cause I have no skills
Nepotism got me making them bills

First grade I had a bully, he was straight dissin'
Asked the principle for help, but he wouldn't listen
Told my dad, next day they were both missin'
Like Shape of Water they were sleeping with fishes
And did I mention he's a vampire? My dad can't die
Paler than a motherfuckin' overcast sky
Only comin' out at night, killin' folks with one bite
Think he sucks? Well, you goddamn right

Me and dad at the ball park, hittin' balls with a bat
If you bully me, you're gonna brawl with a bat
Who needs a sugar daddy when you got a sugar dad?
Unlimited allowance, no cap

Dad been alive for 400 years, vampire shit
He don't show up in the mirrors, rich man shit
He don't show up for his kids
How he live forever, but ain't got time for his kids?
But it's cool

I get that money from the top (bitch)
Call that trickle down economics
You don't wanna mess with me, I promise
The money never stops, but it's got a lot of commas
If I have a bad dream, then I'm hoppin' in his coffin
Dad's richer than Jeff Bezos
It ain't fall, but he's raking up pesos
Puttin' all my haters underneath gravestones
I'm like a baby mouse 'cause he feed me queso, little bread like panko

You will never have a rich dad
You will always have a tiny baby. Bitch dad
You could have money in the bank, but your dad can't hang
'Cause he ain't got fangs, and he don't leave gangs, bitch